update on my dad
May. 16th, 2016 07:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
nansliceMy dad was diagnosed with cancer. We don't know where it started but it's spread in his lungs, liver, bones, and brain. They didn't give us a prognosis. He's refusing chemo or radiation (which I understand) and also pain treatment. He's not in pain right now but they wanted to set up a plan for what we should do later but he's refusing, saying that he'll deal with it when/if it comes to that. Which is such a Dad thing that I can't even be mad. He wants to go out his own way, on his own terms. I can respect that, even though I'm not looking forward to having to take him to the hospital once the pain does set in.
They gave us a steroid prescription to help with the swelling on his brain, which should help give him more control over his right leg and arm.
The doctor at the hospital (we've never gone to this particular doctor or this particular hospital) said this should have been caught a long time ago. I agree. Particularly since Dad has religiously gone to a regular doctor. But there's nothing to be done about the past. We can only move forward.
In reality, today is the same as yesterday, as last week, as last month. He had this the entire time. And honestly, if it weren't for the limpness in his right arm and leg, we still wouldn't know about it. The nurse said his breathing is extremely good. He's lucid and still has all his mental facilities. He's been joking all day. Fuck, right now he's in his bedroom eating strawberries and watching a baseball game. And his bedroom is very nearby where I'm sitting in the living room; I can hear him if he calls for me.
Today has been a struggle. Mom's holding it together so much better than me; I've been crying more often than not. As little as possible in front of Dad, since I don't want to depress him. I've been joking and keeping things going. But man. I'm not really keeping it together very well. I'm probably going to have a long, hard, sobfest when I go to bed.
Thank you all for being here.
They gave us a steroid prescription to help with the swelling on his brain, which should help give him more control over his right leg and arm.
The doctor at the hospital (we've never gone to this particular doctor or this particular hospital) said this should have been caught a long time ago. I agree. Particularly since Dad has religiously gone to a regular doctor. But there's nothing to be done about the past. We can only move forward.
In reality, today is the same as yesterday, as last week, as last month. He had this the entire time. And honestly, if it weren't for the limpness in his right arm and leg, we still wouldn't know about it. The nurse said his breathing is extremely good. He's lucid and still has all his mental facilities. He's been joking all day. Fuck, right now he's in his bedroom eating strawberries and watching a baseball game. And his bedroom is very nearby where I'm sitting in the living room; I can hear him if he calls for me.
Today has been a struggle. Mom's holding it together so much better than me; I've been crying more often than not. As little as possible in front of Dad, since I don't want to depress him. I've been joking and keeping things going. But man. I'm not really keeping it together very well. I'm probably going to have a long, hard, sobfest when I go to bed.
Thank you all for being here.
